“On a typical day, domestic violence hotlines receive approximately 21,000 calls, approximately 15 calls every minute”. NCADV
In honor of domestic violence month, I just wanted to bring to the light what some people have to love through each and everyday of their life. Some people are not even aware that domestic violence is not always someone physically abusing you; domestic violence can be emotional, physical, or sexual. Luckily if you or someone you know is going through a situation where they either want to get out or just need someone to talk to you can click on this link https://ncadv.org/state-by-state, which is the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence website. This site offers tools, numbers, and tons of information that can educate you or someone you know who may be experiencing a situation like so many in this country. They even have stats broken down by state, so you can see just how many people out there are suffering. Here are some stats for Tennessee, which is where I reside.
40% of Tennessee women1 and 32.5% of Tennessee men experience intimate partner physical violence, intimate partner rape and/or intimate partner stalking in their lifetimes.
• 43 Tennesseans were murdered by intimate partners in 2014. Firearms were used in approximately 75% of these homicides.
• 74,023 domestic violence crimes were reported to Tennessee law enforcement in 2014. Many others went unreported.
• 436 intimate partner abductions were reported to Tennessee law enforcement in 2014.5
• Approximately half of all forcible rapes reported to Tennessee law enforcement in 2014 were perpetrated by intimate partners.
I was listening to a podcast today on Spotify titled, “Gangster Capitalism”. This podcast caught my attention because it all episodes are centered around the college admission scandal involving some high-profile actors, their spouses, and business men and women. These benefactors or students in this story, are all kids whose families are among the most wealthiest in the U.S. Listening to this podcast shed new light on the subject for me because there were families who paid anywhere from 15k to upwards of 500k dollars, all for the sake of their children to falsely gain admission to elite colleges, whom they were never qualified for in the first place.
It’s very disheartening to learn that the main person who set up all the meetings, strategies, and eventually structuring of payments, knew how to work the system, who would help him work it, and knew any work arounds that needed to be done in order for the affluent to gain access to their school of choice. Going to an affluent school didn’t exempt these kids from failing; another cover-up to the scheme of the century. For a price, you could get a transcript change as well as make a near perfect on the standardized test of your choosing, all you needed was money.
The podcast presented real-life tape recordings recorded by the FBI between some of the parents and the ring leader of the scheme discussing what they needed to do in order for their child to gain additional time for test taking over several days, how they were going to give their child a separate bubble sheet to fill in the blanks in order to not interfere with the “real” answer sheet…. and of course that answer sheet would later be changed to reflect, at times an almost perfect SAT or ACT score. For an additional price, one’s image could be photoshopped to depict you playing as a member of your school’s football team…but wait your high school didn’t even have a football team…..so how did this get past admissions????
Monies paid for services were taxed as charitable donations, as if the parents were giving the money to a taxable charity in which they would be able to right off at the end of the year. Legal letters were sent out to the families by the companies tax attorney’s thanking them for their donation…and oh by the way, no goods or services were received in return for this donation…
How about being apart of school clubs which you supposedly helped give thousands of volunteer hours throughout your four years of high school to benefit those in need….but you never even stepped into a club meeting. Listening to parents compete against other parents over the phone with the proctor about how they needed transcripts, test scores, and access to certain schools just didn’t sit well for me. There are so many kids who want and strive to succeed, those who don’t have the money or affluence afforded to them to walk to the front of the line, and yet this man has been performing these services for over 20 years!!! yikes…. Cheating is never the answer to life. I can’t wait to see how this will unfold.
How are you spending your time? Are you investing or spending? When I first heard the author of this topic, I immediately thought he would be speaking about money; well in fact it’s not about money, it’s about rather or not your investing or spending your time on the things that are of value or of importance to you. For example if you’re trying to get into school, are you investing your time researching the right school, applying to the right school, or taking the required prerequisites to get into to your dream school, or are you spending time thinking that you want to get in school, in hopes that it will somehow magically happen. Say you’re wanting a promotion at work. Are you actively showing your manager that you deserve that promotion by going the extra mile, or you hoping somehow that dream promotion will land on your lap. This resonated with me this morning, so I wanted to share with you lovely souls. We have have the power to change, the power to invest and the power to spend on the things that matter to us as well. We all have the same amount of time each day, no one has more time than the other based on lifes circumstances, it’s how we choose to utilize the time that we have. So ask yourself where you want to be or what you want to do, and say to yourself, am I investing or spending my time?
Nursing school was or is something that I always wanted to do. I’m sure this sounds cliché to some, but for me and many other nurses out there, helping people has always been in my DNA. My mother is a retired social worker and she spent the greater of 30+ years servicing children with special needs and disabilities. Servicing+Needs+Disabilities+ isn’t this what we do everyday in our profession; the desire to service, to help those in need, and to cure the disabled.
- Make sure your school of choice is Accredited. Accreditation simply means that the school meets all certifications and requirements necessary to function in that formal academic setting.
- GPA..I know, I know, I know. The dreaded GPA is the credit score for students who are competing to get into nursing or medical programs.
- Prerequisites: Do you have the required prerequisites for nursing school entry. Some schools require you to have certain courses completed prior to the admissions process, whereas others do not. In my personal opinion, it was easier for me to have had them all courses completed prior to starting my program. For me to, it was almost like a bargaining tool that gave me an additional one-up on getting accepted into the program.
- So you’ve made the cut…well it’s more to nursing school than just getting in. Here’s some helpful tips which may help you wade through nursing school, such as…………………
- Test-Taking skills: This is something that people like myself struggled with, when I was in nursing school. I couldn’t grasp and understand the concept that “2 answers were right”, you just have to choose the best answer. Other nursing students in my class felt the same way, which made me feel better, however it didn’t negate the fact that we were all struggling, at times, when really didn’t have to.
- Take a deep breath before you erase and circle in another answer, unless you know for sure that you misread the question and your new choice is correct.
- Do practice questions and more questions and more questions, much like the your standardized tests in class or from a practice test bank.
- Focus on the content that you don’t have a firm grasp on and not so much the content that you already possess. Each night if you’re reviewing your notes and you start with the same content; which is the content that you’re already familiar with, then each night when your’e tired of studying, you’re more than likely end up at the start of the difficult concept and not be able to firmly grasp the more difficult ones.
- Get with people who have an answer for you. This means ask of your instructors first when you don’t understand the content. Set up a meeting with them, especially if the content is really difficult for you to grasp. Study groups help some but not all, and if a study group is right for you, meet up with some other students and go over content together; who knows you each may possess the skills in helping each other.
- Don’t wait until the last minute to study. Nursing school isn’t like many other degrees where one may think they can just “wing it”, nursing school requires a person to be a self-learner, dedicated, and patient amongst other traits.
- Clear your mind and your heart before you walk into that class and take that test. Anxiety is something that is natural, it can help us out of dangerous situations or cause us to feel overjoyed. Anxiety however, can cause a lot of self-doubt, as well as unnecessary worry which can over shroud our sense of accomplishment and hard work that we so hard have tried to achieve.
- Time Management skills is something that takes time and skill for nursing students to obtain. You don’t have to wait to become a nurse to learn time management skills, but if you’re one to struggle with being on time for appointments, your job, turning in assignments, etc., then time management is something you’ll need that’ll help you while you’re in school as a student, and once you become a nurse.
At times you may find yourself wanting to quit and just throw in the towel, however taking care of people and advocating for them, is just a small snippet if why I became what I am today.
Doing the right thing can be challenging depending on the situation and the person, however for a patient, doing the right thing is never, ever wrong.
Today was one of thise days that I just wanted to throw my hands up, but I kept calling, and calling, and calling, until I finally made headway.
This was the reason why I became a nurse 14 years ago. Doending almost 2 hours playing phone tag with mid and high level providers should never be the case with something that appears to be so minute.
In the end I pressed on and was able to get the patient what she needed. She may never know what it took or how long it took, however, I left knowing that I did the right thing.
Happy Learning 👩🏿💻♥️⛑
As a nurse, at times you feel as if “no one” cares. When I say no one, I mean your fellow peers, your patient’s, management, senior level executives; gosh even the patient transporters can be a little tiring at times.
Two of the many mantras I repeat to myself; especially on the crazy days, is to always show kindness and compassion. I even tell my kids that when they start to bicker at each other. I say, “now was that kind, or how could you have shown kinder in saying that”.
It may sound silly to think that a nurse has to sike themselves up to take care of someone, and I assure you that’s not the case. I view nurses as frontline providers. Nurses, and anyone who works in what they consider customer service, has to learn how to place their inner feelings aside for the moment and take care of the person standing or sitting in front them.
It doesn’t matter to them that you’re failing in school, your relationship with your spouse is suffering, or your child is going through a rough patch; what matters in that moment, is our ability to show kindness, compassion, respect, and awareness that this person’s life will change in a matter of seconds depending on how I treat them in this moment.
As all of us embark on what we call our daily routines this day, remind yourself that you have complete power over your tongue, and that your words and physical expressions of compassion and kindness will go a long way.
Have you shown someone kindness and compassion today?
I shared a video that goes along with this written post. I shared, because like myself, and many other adults who have children that are young and active, and require their parents to have a never-ending imagination. My daughter told her dad the other day, that she wished she had 2 siblings like us, meaning my husband and myself. She didn’t tell me ( I’m not always cool), however it does resonate to me, that at times, they look at us like fun parents who are not too old to have good ole fashioned fun.
I had a very active imagination, for the simple fact that I had 2 older brothers who like to watch wrestling and play with skeletor. I used to put my mom’s silk slips over my head and sing in the mirror or play make believe with my barbies while using different voices like news reporters. Either way, I’ve never lost my passion for make believe, and I want my children to know that even though their parents are bboth busy with supporting them, in addition to school, we always want them to know that we were those same goofball kids years ago………it’s just tucked away for special times.
Moral of the story……you never too old to have fun, and you never know, you may learn something about your children that you didn’t know before.